I almost hate to comment on these sorts of stories, but apparently the Blessed Virgin Mary has more messages for mankind, and she’s decided to communicate them by appearing on a garage door. At around 5:30pm every day. In Minersville, PA. Conclusion?
“The Blessed Virgin Mary is trying to tell us something. A miracle is going to happen in the next few weeks. What, when, why, I don’t know but I feel she’s trying to tell us something,” said Joanne Deconcini.
Well sure: I know that whenever I want to tell my wife to pick up some more Coke Zero on her way home from work, I never outright tell her this: instead I just cryptically email her a blurry photo of myself. How, when, why this would work, I don’t know, but this one time she brought home some leftover Chinese food, which was sort of a miracle.
Seriously though: if Mary has a message, and if she has the power to bend light or burn images into garage doors, why not just write out her message in nice, big letters, or maybe at least attempt sign language? Why appear as just a jiggling indistinct blob? If this is some sort of game of spiritual charades, these aren’t exactly helpful clues.
“I think it’s wonderful, actually, that there’s actually an image on somebody’s garage door and she moves back and forth and she doesn’t stay still. To me it’s a blessing for me to have her here in Minersville,” said Peggy Mayhue. (emp added)
Moving back and forth you say? Well, that puts the Samurai Fence-Jesus in Lodi, CA to shame.
Look, obviously the people here are searching and sincere, and I hope they get a thrill out of this or even that it helps motivate them to do something good. But these have to be some of the silliest examples of pareodalia I’ve ever seen. Even Bugeyed Pancake-Jesus was a better likeness of a person.
The worst part about this story is the people’s attempt at some token skepticism: “witnesses also said if you touch the image no shadow from the sun appears. The image remains.” But if you are going to try to debunk something, why be timid? Get a heavy blanket, hold it above your head and then blot out all possible external sources of light (including those reflected from below) with you inside up against the garage: either the image will then appear on the back of the blanket instead, or it will remain on the garage with you in the dark. Either way, you’ve at least learned something, which is a whole lot better than just standing around in the street.
Update: Remember the claims about how the light cannot be put in shadow? Watch the video at this blog about the story. Sure looks like people’s shadows are blocking it out to me…